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Journal Entries

Props to another’s blog


Saw this paragraph on this dude’s blog, twas pretty sweet.

This blog: http://idlewind.wordpress.com/2009/07/03/why-am-i-not-doing-ai-research/#comment-2

This paragraph:

Most of the time we do not know what we really want in life and we just rely on moral standards, assumed expectations of others and the way of the least resistance to guide us through decisions. This is completely okay and natural and is probably the only thing keeping us running in the modern society. But, on the occasions when we do know what we want we should realize that and pursue our goals, dreams and hopes with everything at our disposal. We might fail anyway but if we don’t invest ourselves in the areas which interest us we can just sit back press the big “fast forward” button of life and wait till it’s over.

Categories
Book Reviews

Review of The Shack by WM. Paul Young


Saw this on the Barnes and nobel best seller. Looked like one of those dumb generic horror/thriller stories. Read the back and I was like…. wait…. huh? The italicized question on the back was “Where is god in a world so filled with unspeakable pain.”

I’ve always been interesting in religion and philosophy. I wanted to see how this guy would answer the problem of pain and suffering in the world, while at the same time there being a god.

Basic plot: Guy experiences a tragedy, one day finds a note from god, has an experience and many conversations with god, he returns to his home as a new man with a different outlook. It’s based on a true story.

…..

after reading it….

well….

I was kind of disappointed. It didn’t answer the questions that I wanted it to answer. There were beautiful parts in it, but it didn’t really give  true wisdom. Basically it said that you can’t understand god, so don’t try, just realize he’s there and dedicate your life to having a relationship with him.

That’s great and all, but I just got the impression it was setting me up for real answers, not that type of answer.

Also, the main character is not very believable when he’s having his dialogues with god. When he’s talking with the woman god (There are three parts to god, and the woman is one of them), she seems exactly like the oracle from the matrix. I seriously think the author copied her character exactly. Physical descriptions and demeanor.

If anything, the book opened me up to the idea that I can get a book on the bestseller list if it’s better than that (which I don’t think would be exceedingly difficult)

The one good part in the book is when god tells the main character where the killer is… but that kind of goes against the idea of god not interfering… which … doesn’t make sense to me?

SO… overall, it was decent, but I wouldn’t read it again or recommend it unless your already a catholic and not a skeptic. From a literary standpoint, it had very simple prose, easy to understand and follow, made the book go faster, decent amount of thriller ness and anticipation, just not my cup of tea.

Some cool quotes:

“At home in your own skin” –The goal everyone should try to reach me thinks

” Let’s pray that the human race never escapes Earth to spread its iniquity elsewhere.” C.S. Lewis

“You don’t play a game or color a picture with a child to show your superiority. Rather, you choose to limit yourself so as to facilitate and honor that relationship.” (When God talking about why he limited himself to human form as jesus)

“Relationships are never about power and one way to avoid the will to hold power of another is to choose to limit oneself– to serve.”

“Humans are so lost and damaged that to you it is almost incomprehensible that people could work or live together without someone being in charge.”

“First one person, and then a few, and finally even many are easily sacrificed for the good and ongoing existence of that system” — made me think of hitler, jesus was talking about why power and hierarchy and laws prevents true relationships and goodness.

“It’s not the work, but the purpose that makes it special.”

“Oh my soul… be prepared for him who knows how to ask questions.” T.S. Elliot

“Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction” Blaise Pascal

“But why do we keep all that crap inside?”

“Because we believe it’s safer there. And, sometimes, when you’re a kid trying to survive, it really is safer there. Then you grow up on the outside, but on the inside you’re still that kid in the dark cave surrounded by monsters, and out of habit you keep adding to your collection. We all collect things we value, you know?”

“The idea behind expectation requires that someone does not know the future or outcome and is trying to control behavior to get the desired result. Humans try to control behavior largely through expectations. I know you and everything about you. Why would I have an expectation other than what I already know?”

“Mack, I don’t want to be the first among a list of values; I want to be at the center of everything. When I live in you, then together we can live through everything that happens to you. Rather than the top of the pyramid, I want to be the center of a mobile, where everything in your life– your friends, your family, occupation, thoughts, activities is connected to me but moves with the wind, in and out back and forth, in an incredible dance of being.”

“Earth has  no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.” Thomas Moore

“Faith never knows where it is being led, but it knows and loves the One who is leading” (Oswald Chambers)

That’s it!

Categories
Journal Entries

What’s new?


New job: I put together devices that are used to train people what a positive test result looks like for the bladder cancer NMP22 device. The company is called Inverness Medical. I also write generic letters to high-risk groups for bladder cancer. Lol, it’s sounds  a lot more technical than it is. The devices are just very boring and tedious. Writing the letters is actually kinda fun.

Romance: *grin* Has been a fantastic summer.

Classes at George Washington U: I’m taking Islam, Short story, Intermediate fiction, Biology, and Cognitive Neuroscience. They weren’t my first choices, but I’m happy with them.

Categories
Journal Entries

Why I want to sell my NEW MAC for a PC


>.< *Growl*

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… so the reason I haven’t been poasting… is… my computer has been in the shop for a week or so.

What happened:

I was using itunes bout a week ago. Suddenly, everything froze up and a message flashed saying something about not being able to locate something. I turned off computer, restarted, and there was this huge flashing question mark.

I read internet forms, went through several debugging steps, they didn’t work. Read more on internet forms… it was looking VERY grim. Basically, they said if the things I did didn’t work, then you were fucked and had to get the data off your machine and re-install the operating system.

Tried disk repair, it wouldn’t even recognize that my mac hard drive was mounted.

So… After scrounging the internet for a way to get my data off my computer for free, i finally gave in and realized I would have to buy a 100 piece of software, DISK WARRIOR.

Took computer to the Mac “GENIUSES.” Second after I told the guy wut happened he was like “shit.” Then I knew i was fucked. And he’s like “yea… your going to have to reinstall, but your going to lose all your data.” I”M like well i don’t wanna lose all my fucking data. So he tells me “do what you gotta do to get the data off and then bring it back.”

PIFF! I bought diskwarrior (ironically at the apple store… it’s like a scheme). After three days of trying to get it to fix my computer (it would keep kind of freezing up) I finally let it go for like 10 hours and it came up with a message saying “We could not repair your hard drive, but have extracted the data” or something like that. So i got the data… but… i didn’t know how to get the data OFF my computer. It wouldn’t recognize my external hard drive and I couldn’t eject disk warrior to put in a blank disk.

FUCKING!

So…. I finally figured out how to format an external hard drive as mac system, then I realized that mine was too small, used my dad’s 500 gig one, reformatted it for mac, then put all the info on it… and then….. get this… tried to reinstall mac…

well….. it installed, cept when I ran it, it KEPT FREEZING UP when i tried to download any updates or add any data to it.

>.<. At this point I am ready to strangle a bunny. An especially cute one.

…. I take it back to the mac store (i’m 100 percent positive it is a hardware problem becuase it wasn’t make sense and software is logical)

They tell me…. It’s a hard ware problem … :-D…. they replace the hard drive under warrantay, and i’m up and running again… fml. I learned a lot from that experience.

I should back up EVERY DAY that I do something new… because while my comp was getting fixed, my employer was waiting for graphs/letters that I had done which were on the computer.

I’mma get a rugged 300 gig external HD and back up like there’s no tomorrow. I want flash memory for my HD, but that will have to wait cuz that costs like 350 for 120 gigs solid state memory. costs like 200 for 500 gigs of disk memory (moving). So until I get more money, i’ll just go with the external HD.

Anyway… that’s my MAC experience. Lovely machines. Mac’s elegance has seduced me!

You have no idea … I was scared shitless when that question mark came up. I thought all my china photos, writing, EVERYTHING was lost. Raven was right though. She said to me. “I know you’ll find a way to fix it.”

>.< I can’t imagine wut this woulda been like if I didn’t know how to use a computer… like i was an old person or something. Thank god I know um better than I know women :-P.

Categories
Journal Entries

Michael Jackson


… I was so fucking surprised. … i wonder if people will continue to make fun of him or finally leave him alone.

I didn’t know his music very well, but I’m listening to more of his to realize wut i missed out on… he’s a character.

Categories
Journal Entries

Orientation


it was … interesting …

There were a lot of activities. Mostly pep rallies and information sessions. There were some cool ones though… like capture the flag games and touring the city at night XD.

I love DC at night. It’s so beautiful, especially along the water where all the city lights look like some kinda luminescent fish on the water.

I’m glad I chose George Washington University. I’m confident I can really grow there, discover what it is i wanna do with myself and have some amazing experiences along the way.

I was very surprised at how outgoing the peeps were who ran the orientation (mostly students). They had these huge performances with dancing and singing and skits and we even got to see this one comedy comedy group that satirized the media/government. Apparently, they train all year for orientation (choreography for the dances and such).

Overall, pretty positive experience at orientation.

Only negatives were the dorms I stayed in (we discovered 5 cockroaches and the bed sheets were damp), and the people.

I met a few cool people, but a lot weren’t really my type. I know I’m judging them from first glance, but the people formed clicks very easily. I just hope it’s not like that in the fall. I think it’s because everyone there is desperate to make friends/be nice that they hang out with anyone who instantly feels slightly comfortable, hence the grouping.

I’m not immensely outgoing when it comes to meeting new people, so I was at a loss… i’m more of a quiet observer until I figure everyone out and then I enter into the conversation/friend making stage. :-P A few of you can attest to this.

FUCKING 5 cockroaches, I couldn’t believe it. God I hope I get a double suite, not a damn 4 person one. If i get a 4 person one, I may have to eliminate a few peeps as to make it two person :-D.

The skits made me think more about drinking/drugs/partying. I’m defs gonna try most of it (not so into the drugs, unless it’s a hallucinogen or something cuz that would be cool). I think i’ll get more involved with sports in college as well. There are so many clubs and activities. I have to decide which I wanna dedicate my time to

*nod* So it begins.